The following were my options:
I could ineffectively sulk in bed and sleep all day, which I did for one day. This didn't help to situation at all.
I could apply for another job which is some of what I want but not all of it. This would be a band-aid because I know I have the intentions of moving on to the Office of EMS. I am not sure if I am still going to apply or not.
Effectively, I went out of town for the weekend to Virginia Beach for Rescue Squad Convention and spent time with friends feeling loved and accepted. While I was there the Assistant Director for the Office of EMS told me not to get discouraged and that it was a tough decision. He told me to reapply for there next job opening because they looked forward to adding me to the team.
Effectively, I have recommitted myself to my work, always giving 110% and never less. Always doing what I love to do, stay busy. It means getting into work at 7am and not stopping till 11pm. Always looking for improvements to make. It makes me happy and gives me a sense of power when I see positive change. I can go to bed the rest of the night and sleep contently, as long as someone else doesn't require my assistance during my REM cycle.
3 comments:
Liz,
I am sorry you didn't get what you wanted.
Let me ask you something though....
Is it healthy to work from 7AM to 11PM all the time? Is it balanced? Does it leave room in your life for other things?
I think that working excessively is a band aid approach.
I know, I've done it.
I think you went through a bit of self-development because of all this. Although you did not get what you wanted, look at what you did get as a result of it all. Some vacation time with friends feeling loved for example. I know that you really wanted the position, and that everything else seems to be an inadequate substitute sometimes, but you were able to get more of what you wanted out of it all than if you had not read the textbook. You are already changing your behavioral techniques.
I'm sorry you didn't get what you want, I understand the desire to sulk all day long.
It sounds as if the conversation with the Assistant Director would be a boost to the need for power.
What need did you feel you missed out on by not getting the job you applied for? You said you had spent time at the convention feeling loved and acceptance. Is this what you were missing, or just comfortable?
Post a Comment