Through reading this book I have learned that I have exhausted almost all the means suggested in here to get what I NEED from him.
I have asked and pleaded and begged but the bottom line is I am not getting that commitment. So... I examined myself to realize that this person is a great friend, best friend, but not one to be in a relationship with. Right now it is a security blanket, I must let this security blanket go. It will help me with my freedom, love, and power when I do so.
I do what I can alone, we have worked through many problems together, but this commitment issue is no going to go away.
I will be able to carry out "The Washington Post" in a more effective and efficient manner when I convince myself that a relationship is not what I need with this person right now. I need freedom, happiness, love, and power. The only way to do that is to end the relationship. Therefore, I must let this security blanket go.
6 comments:
Liz,
My best to you as you make this hard transition.
I always have that phrase in my head pop up when these things happen: "When one door closes another door opens." I hope when it does, it is just what you need.
Liz,
Good luck with your decision. It is never easy to free yourself from a secure situation, no matter how good or bad it might be. I hope once you are able to look at yourself a little closer you can find what you need to complete you (your love, power, fun, and freedom).
I have been thinking myself about whether or not to take some time and "find myslef." I can't give someone what they want or need, if I don't even know what I want or what I need. We'll see how it goes.
Liz,
Good luck with your decision. No worries though, it all works out in the end. One positive thing to note, at least you have gained one more friend. Keep your head up. Remember the little engine that could? Your time will come.
doug
Kris:
I went through the same thing a few years ago. I had to walk away. The relationship failed to give me peace of mind. Just thinking about being alone, made me apprehensive. But after I walked away and trenched out my own path. I felt empowered. New doors opened.
I highly recommend you gain that control and don't be afraid. You are stronger than you know. As women we sometimes forget that.
Bonnie
I'll give you the other perspective. My wife and I lived together a couple of years before we got married. We had been talking the marriage thing, but I had been married and was worried about screwing up a good thing with getting married.
Well, one day she said, "you like the make, you like the model, you like the way it drives - buy me or put me back on the lot!"
That made em a believer in the "if it's made to be" axiom. I'll bet your situation was meant to be as well.
It takes incredible strength to be able to not only identify and decide to act as you did, but also to be able to write about it.
It sounds like you are making a difficult decision to make things better for yourself.
I hope that everything turns out for the best.
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